The Balance of Power: Between Therapist & Client

Entering a therapist’s or counsellor’s room for the first time can feel daunting. The space is carefully arranged—a seat positioned just so, a box of tissues within reach but placed slightly out of reach “just in case.” As you settle in, it becomes clear: this is their domain, their natural environment.

So where does that leave you? What power do you truly have in a space designed by someone else? And what risks arise if the therapeutic relationship doesn’t feel balanced?

Well, the power lies more in your hands than you might think. Here’s why:

Your Story Is Yours Alone

Any counsellor or therapist you choose will have qualifications, skills, and experience that set them apart. But there’s one thing they don’t have—your story. No matter their expertise, only you know the depth of your experiences and the emotions tied to them.

A therapist’s role is to create an environment where openness, honesty, and vulnerability feel safe—but if the space doesn’t feel right, the therapist won't receive the full picture. Your story unfolds at your pace, and if trust hasn’t formed, parts of it may remain untold. You decide when and what to share.

Booking Sessions: The Choice is Yours

So, you’ve had your first therapy session—it went well, and you left feeling optimistic. Before heading out, you casually say, “See you next week,” and your therapist nods. Days pass, and your therapist keeps your slot open, but you haven’t re-booked.

It’s the day before. No appointment yet.

As therapists, we may believe we were the right fit for you, and we may assume you’ll return. But ultimately, the decision is yours. Therapy isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach, and continuing sessions is your choice. No explanation is required—your journey is yours to navigate.

Guiding the Conversation

During therapy, your therapist might pick up on themes, names, or moments they want to explore further. After listening to your story, they may ask, “That’s interesting—would you be open to discussing this more?”

At this point, you can simply reply, “No, thank you.”

While exploring certain topics might be beneficial, if you don’t feel comfortable, feel too vulnerable, or simply aren’t ready, your boundaries must be respected. Therapy belongs to the client, not the therapist.

Creating a Truly Safe Space

A therapist cannot, and should never, tell you their space is ‘safe.’ Safety is something you determine. If a power imbalance exists, it can lead to:

🚫 Trust issues
🚫 Resistance or defensiveness
🚫 Difficulty expressing vulnerability
🚫 Ethical concerns (such as coercion or manipulation)
🚫 Client dependency rather than empowerment

Therapists and counsellors strive to neutralize power imbalances—for their own integrity and for your well-being. But ultimately, the power in therapy must be shared.